I’m scared of girls
I’m scared
of all the ways
in which we are capable
of hurting
each other
I’m scared of memories
of me
hiding under the slides
scraping my knees into gravel
practicing a face
that might pass muster
today
pressing lips into appropriate
thinness
trying to wear down
a body
that will never
be classified
as petite
squinting my eyes
so they are less
noticeable
scratching at the colour
of my skin
hoping I can bleed
the wrongness
away
every day
I try another way
to vanish
once
I thought girls were
better than this
but we’re not
and I will always
be afraid of us